I don’t get this story, really. Somehow, two men (who the news outlet decided should be made clear, are of middle eastern descent) became very dissatsified with the food quality and service at a McDonald’s. Seems they serve crappy food there, and service levels are abysmal at best due to the McJobbers who work there having minimal to no skills, earning meager wages. Hey, who knew?

The interesting thing is that these geniuses apparently felt the way to solve this problem was to threaten to blow up the Pentagon. What the hell?

“Two gentlemen made threats toward blowing up McDonald’s and also blowing up the Pentagon. By the time officials arrived, the men had already fled the scene. We immediately contacted the FBI, who is conducting the investigation at this point,” Wharton Police Department Capt. Richard Coleman said.

Maybe Ronald is a secret agent or something?

Bank of America reports that they lost a “small number” of tapes that could contain customers’ financial records. How much is a “small number?” Oh, enough to hold the records of 1.2 million people. I guess when you’re the third largest bank in the US, that IS a small number.

Time to switch banks!

Take a gander friends, at this arrest record. Mr. Todd R Salvador or “T-Rex” as per his online identity, is also known as Tripp Eisen (pictured above), a guitarist for Static-X. What was he arrested for?

As reported by the Asbury Park Press, police in California arrested Salvador on Feb. 10 after finding him sleeping in a parked car with a girl with whom he had just had sexual intercourse, said Jon Fleischman of the Orange County Sheriff’s Department.

Salvador was charged with committing a lewd act with a child and was released after posting $100,000 bail, Fleischman said.

On Thursday (Feb. 24), Salvador was apprehended in Orange County, Calif. by two detectives from New Jersey in connection with an incident last month where he allegedly met a 14-year-old girl from Sayreville, New Jersey through the Internet, drove from Pennsylvania and sexually assaulted her in an Old Bridge shopping center. He was charged with kidnapping, aggravated sexual assault, luring to entice a minor through the Internet and endangering the welfare of a child, according to the Asbury Park Press. If convicted, he faces a maximum of 30 years in prison on the kidnapping charge alone.

Okay, rule #1: this is the era of Michael Jackson’s Big Trial ^TM. So, if you are a person of any public prominence whatsoever, and your sexual psychoses lean you in the predatory direction, now is the time to keep that on the down low. And rule #2: even if you can’t keep it in your pants for the sake of obeying statutory rape laws, for Christ’s sake, don’t do it in a car where everyone can see you!

The irony to this story is that the allegations claim Salvador, in meeting his victims online, concoted a story in which he claimed to be a guitarist who impersonates the real Tripp Eisen in a cover band. Seeing that there are quite a few sex crazed sickos out there making up stories about who they are to lure in their victims, he probably (correctly) assumed no one would believe him if he told the truth in the chatrooms he allegedly stalked.

First, Paris Hilton’s T-Mobile Sidekick was hacked. Now the same person claiming responsibility for Paris Hilton’s social (in)graces being spewed about the ‘net claims to have done the same for Fred Durst’s mobile device. And the results aren’t pretty:

A man who claims to be the same cracker who broke into Paris Hilton’s Sidekick has done it again, this time posting a 3-minute video of rock professional Fred Durst having unprotected sex with a woman.

No, no, NO!!! Fred Durst in a grainy mobile-phone porno is NOT GOOD!!! NOT GOOD!!!

The town of Lafayette, Louisiana has grown tired of its lack of broadband service. Despite having a cable and landline phone company serving the area, both have refused to upgrade their networks to offer true high speed internet access (instead option for a slower copper “last mile”), and both clearly state that they have no plans to do Fiber-to-the-Home in the future.

So, the town of Lafayette has decided to take the broadband issue on by itself, and begin work on a municipal fiber network. While their site promotes the the idea that such a service will offer helpful competition with the cable and phone companies, it’s clear that neither really had any plans to compete anyway.

Yet, BellSouth isn’t one to let this opportunity to act like asses pass them by. Seeing as this fiber project is such a huge threat to the current duopoly, it has threatened to remove the Cingular customer service call center from the town, potentially eliminating 1,300 jobs.

Why would BellSouth want to keep all its operations in a parish where it had no other significant business interest, Oliver asked rhetorically.

The call center, which handles customer service tasks for Cingular, could be located in “Timbuktu” and still perform the same services, Oliver said.

“Would you still keep people there?” Oliver said.

I would if I expected those people to be loyal customers. A person can’t afford a cell phone if they don’t have a job to pay the bill with. Or would BellSouth rather leave that to the municipality to handle, too?